Its the beginning of a new year. We love this time of year for setting goals, wiping the slate clean and getting fired up to start doing all those things we know we should be doing, the things we want to be doing, the things that will increase our health and happiness.
But for a lot of people, a few weeks into the year, the enthusiasm begins to wane, doubt creeps in, the going gets tough and before they know it their new years resolutions are a fleeting memory only to be rekindled when the following year comes around. According to one study, only 9% of people who make new year resolutions, actually successfully stick to them long term.
So what can we do to increase our chances of success? How can we set goals that stick, rather than setting ourselves up for failure?
Here are 5 mistakes that many people make and what you can do instead to increase your chances of success:
Too Big – Sometimes amidst the enthusiasm of setting great goals its easy to get carried away with what we want to achieve and once the rose tinted glasses begin to fade away, the prospect of tackling our BHAG’s (Big Hairy Audacious Goals) seems like a daunting one.
Now don’t get me wrong its good to have BHAG’s as long term goals, but take the time to work the time frame backwards. Break it down to what you want to achieve this month, this week and today. When you are clear on the few simple tasks you need to do today, it suddenly seems a lot more achievable.
Too Vague – “I want to lose weight” or “I want to earn more money” are great goals, but they lack specifics and if you don’t know the specific result you want to achieve, then how will you know when you’ve achieved it?
So get specific on how much weight you want to lose or how much money you want to earn, set a time frame for when you want to hit that target and break it into incremental daily actions that will get you to that target in that time frame.
Too Many – Confucius said “The hunter who chases two rabbits, catches none”. This one is all about focus. If you’ve set too many goals, then your attention is divided and the more you divide your attention, the less likely you are to achieve anything significant in any one area.
So start by just choosing one goal. Choose the one that will have the biggest impact on your life and when you achieve that one, then you can move onto the next one.
Too Casual – Would achieving your goals be a nice to have or are they a must have? If we’re not serious about our goals then our unconscious ‘monkey mind’ will do everything in its power to talk us out of doing the hard work. ‘Stay in bed’ it will say, ‘You deserve a lie in’ it will say, ‘You can start tomorrow’ it will say, and if we’re only half hearted about our goals, then the monkey mind will win every time.
Instead you need to start out by doing everything you can to set yourself up for success. This can be things like connecting to a sense of purpose behind your goals, getting an accountability partner, set up stakes and forfeits that you will have to face if you fail and remove all unnecessary temptation and distraction.
Too Remote – This one is a big one. We set goals as things we want to achieve at some time and place in the future. We fall into the if/then trap. We think if I achieve X, then I will be happy. The reality is, that even if we do achieve our goals, we might feel a fleeting sense of fulfilment but it soon dissipates.
So rather than focusing on what you want to achieve in the future, focus on the present. Focus on enjoying the process of working towards your goals, do the things that excite you AND move you towards achieving your goals, connect with a feeling of gratitude for having the opportunity to work towards your goals.
Because achieving goals, as with life, is all about the journey, not the destination.